Saturday, September 10, 2011

I'm tired of this SH*! listen up My Pretties... kill the LIST!!!!!

I will preference this statement by saying Yes! I've watched and learned from the old guy in the Dos Equis commercials...With that said I'm not an overly rotund Buddha or Monk with telekinesis. Also, I never took Quantum Physics and barely raised my daughter without losing all of my hair(lost the battle of the hairline though).All of that is to say "I don't know everything about all things",But,(there's always a but) I do know a "lil sumthn sumthn".The something that I know need to be SHOUTED!!
from rooftops. I've seen enough talk shows, blogs and reality matchmakers to cringe. The idea of an attractive,smart and seemingly beautiful woman(inside) is one thing. Upon further inspection they pull out "Ye Old Dusty List". Mind you it's been rewritten 3or4 times since high school and the last re-write was after a night out with 'girlfriends'. You woke up with 1 of your 'Jimmy Choo's or Louboutin's' missing(no-clue just part of girls night out). The zipper on your dress is now in the front and all of your unmentionables are on his head and in his mouth(don't ask) your immediate question should be "who the hale? and why a midget?" Needless to say your answer materialized.A fresh tattoo on your thigh...yyyeeepp! it reads"Roger's piece of Cherry pie"..your guys' name is Kevin. All because he had 7 of the 10 qualities on your 'grocery' list of criteria. Suffice it to say that after 3 bottles of wine and a shared 'doobie' that someone brought(no snitchin')...enough said!! The spider lamp in the corner had at least 6 items off your list! Kill the list..destroy the list... If you look at most women that are still bound and gagged by their sacred list, they are probably still single. Now if you want to be single then Please.. please disregard this whole blog post and I do wish you well,otherwise the list is your problem.You cannot shop for people and qualities like groceries or parts for your computer.You may find yourself alone longer than you might want.We were all born with common sense,free will(for making choices) and a Heart.. trust it... trust in yourself.. mistakes will be made, but you learn and hopefully make good decisions later...kill the list..MM